Category Archives for Blog

Why Wait Until Next Year?

Every year, we all know at least one person who has made a New Year’s resolution to lose weight. It’s the first of the year, a fresh start, a new page. A huge percentage of these folks will start a

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Is Emotional Infidelity Worse Than A Physical Affair?

The media depicts a world where married couples seem incapable of being faithful to one another. It is a world in which lying to someone you love and cheating is glorified, sexy and exciting, while the

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Great Spouses Aren’t Selfish–8 Ways to Overcome it

Over the next few months, I’ll be writing about personality traits and habits that can make a marriage succeed or fail.  This week’s post is about selfishness. When we are teenagers,

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You Can Be Self-Confident

You either have self-confidence or you don’t, right? Wrong. Anyone can develop self-confidence. You just have to be open to change. A great irony is that people who lack self-confidence are the same

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Back to Basics: 4 Tips for Being Authentic with Your Kids

As a parent, sometimes it seems like our kids just aren’t listening to us. Don’t let them fool you.  We have no idea how much of what we say they absorb, assimilate and recall as adults. This

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Is Your Brain Like a Messy Closet?

Sometimes my brain reminds me of a messy closet. My closet has a bunch of new and old clothes and shoes and other stuff in it. Some of these clothes I wear all the time. Others I have literally forgotten

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The Secret to Having the Body You Want

THE SIMPLE SECRET TO HAVING THE BODY YOU WANT As someone who spent most of her life being overweight while looking for the secret to being thinner, I found that the answer was a simple one. All I have

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The Changing Job Description of “Mother”

Your daughter isn’t a kid anymore. She hasn’t lived at home for years, maybe even decades.  You don’t want to be shut out of her life, but maybe you feel that way. Is it because you

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How to Turn Off the Warning Sirens

There is nothing I have ever done in my life that has made me feel as vulnerable as becoming a mother.  Not even falling in love. As parents, we are pretty much constantly concerned about the wellbeing

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Love Being the Peach

I love that quote circulating the Internet that says something like “you can be the sweetest, juiciest peach in the world, but there will always be someone who doesn’t like peaches.” I think

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Closeness and Conflict Resolution

There is a wealth of evidence that having close, loving relationships is crucial to our well-being and happiness. Researchers have found that people with strong social connections have less stress-related

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As Rafiki said, “Change is Good!”

I saw a bumper sticker on my morning walk which said, “If you can’t change your mind, are you sure you have one?” Do you ever say, in a resigned voice, “That’s just the way I am?”  Do

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Come Down From Your Helicopter!

By now, most people have heard the term “helicopter parenting.” It refers to parents who hover over their children as much as possible, and do things for their children that their children are capable

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Questioning Rules

I’ll confess at the outset that I am not a fan of rules. I realize that sometimes they are necessary to solve a problem or to create a boundary. They also establish values for a society. But do you unquestioningly

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We Become Old When We Stop Having Goals

Today, I had one of those moments when I had to face the possibility that I might not be able to do something I have my heart set on doing.  To celebrate turning 60, I really wanted to hike Wainwright’s

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If You Want Security in Your Relationship, Trust Works Better Than Control

I was listening to a fascinating TED talk with Ricardo Semler*, and he said something that really resonated with me and got me thinking.  “The idea that having control generates security is a very

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Think You Can’t Change? Think Again!

Some people believe they can’t change. They are just a certain way, and believe they have no control over this.  These people have what Carol Dweck, a Stanford psychologist, would call

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Manage Expectations for a Healthy, Loving Relationship With Your Daughter

One of the things I hear mothers of adult daughters talk about a lot is their expectations. Whether we voice them or not, we all have hopes and expectations for our daughters, both big things and little

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You Can’t Teach Your Kids What You Don’t Know

Sometimes being a parent can be so overwhelming. We want to be the best possible parent, but we make that a higher priority than being the best possible person.  We give our kids lots of love and

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Mothers and Daughters: Criticism and Acceptance

The single biggest complaint daughters have about their moms is, “She’s always criticizing me.” If you are a mom, you may be thinking, “I can’t open my mouth because my daughter takes

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